Neurodiversity in ministry: embracing our extraordinary differences

Access to Work (ATW) is a government funded scheme that helps people overcome barriers within their work because of disability, neurodivergence and/or mental health issues. It is open to everyone in a paid or stipendiary position, full-time or part-time, permanent or temporary. ATW can provide financial support towards the provision of special equipment or access software, mobility and other aids needed at work, specialist coaching and training, transport to and from work when taxis or special transport is needed, and the cost of a support worker and/or travel buddy.

An online application is followed by a work place assessment and then, if granted, the offer of support.

You do not necessarily need a formal diagnoses or assessment to apply for ATW. The application form asks questions about barriers and difficulties you are experiencing at work and the workplace assessment is designed to identify the mitigations, support and equipment that would help you. It can be helpful to have an Occupational Health Assessment before making an application and the diocese will enable this if it is felt to be necessary.

Whether you are a member of Clergy paid through the Church Commissioners, employed directly by particular churches/chaplaincies or other staff employed by parishes ~ you can also apply for ATW support. Please discuss with our HR advisors for an initial conversation about ATW and for support in making an application or information about pathways to screening or diagnosis.

→ Read more about ATW here
→ Contact our diocesan HR advisors

→ Download the Minchinhampton team’s joint article on neurodiversity

Dear Friends,

One of the greatest challenges many of us face is the pressure to appear “normal” – to fit in, to meet expectations, to cover up our struggles and just get on with life. We tell ourselves little lies about who we are and what we can do, hoping that, eventually, we might actually become the people we pretend to be. But the truth is, real freedom comes when we stop pretending and embrace who we truly are. As Jesus said in John 8:32, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

For me, this journey towards truth has come through the recent discovery that I have ADHD. I spent years wondering why I struggled with certain aspects of my role as a priest. Remembering people’s names is nearly impossible for me, no matter how much I try, and paperwork and detailed administrative tasks feel overwhelming. These are not small things for a rector, but finally understanding why I struggle has been incredibly freeing. I no longer beat myself up over my limitations; instead, I lean on the wonderful team around me, who help ensure that these vital aspects of ministry are covered.

And I am not alone. Tracey, our curate, has dyslexia and dyspraxia. Natalie, our Associate Vicar, has recently discovered she is autistic. Each of us has tried to hide our difficulties, to compensate in ways that often exhausted us. But, in recent months, we have begun to share more honestly with one another and with the church about how our minds work. It is not that we are giving up on the things we find hard, but rather we are learning to be kind to ourselves, whilst striving to be most fully the person God made us to be.

Neurodiversity can be a real challenge, particularly in roles that require a wide range of skills. For clergy working alone, it can feel like an impossible burden. But when we work together as a team, our differences become strengths. I may struggle with remembering names, but I have gifts in other areas. Tracey may find written communication difficult, but she brings creativity and warmth that enrich our ministry. Natalie may find some social interactions exhausting, but her deep insight and pastoral care are invaluable. Each of us has something to bring, and each of us has things we need help with. It is in recognising this that we find true freedom.

This isn’t just a lesson for our clergy team, it is a lesson for all of us. No one person can do everything. No one person should have to. When we pretend we can do it all, we set ourselves up for failure. When we acknowledge our need for one another, we allow God to work through us in ways we never imagined.

Just as our clergy team is learning to rely on one another’s strengths, our churches must learn to do the same, both with each other and with our communities. Our work with the Minchinhampton Community Hub and the Amberley Shop on the Common show how much stronger we are when we collaborate between church and community.

The truth about ourselves can sometimes be difficult to face. But in doing so, we become more free to let go of the guilt and frustration over the things we find difficult. We are free to support one another, knowing that, together, we can accomplish far more than we ever could alone. So, let us stop pretending we can be perfect, let us embrace the truth, then the truth will set us free.

With every blessing,
The Rector

How did you come across this thing of being Neurodiverse?
Good question. I came across it through my daughter who was struggling transitioning to secondary school and we were working out was there was some kind of neurodiversity going on. She wasn’t succeeding the way we’d have expected her to having excelled kind of at primary school and suddenly couldn’t cope with what was going on. And so we really explored that and decided that Daisy had some features of ADHD with the executive function and as I researched that on her behalf discovered that actually it’s very genetic.

So was that like a kind of Eureka moment? Was that like a kind of like ‘oh, this is me’?
Yeah, I think so. Very much so. Um and realising why I’d felt like I didn’t fit either through school or then through the world of work and the ministry. It was an explanation of for example when I was doing my GCSE’s I was studied by my science teacher as a case study of the ‘able underachiever’ in his master’s degree and and so he was exploring different ways in which to try and harness my kind of intelligence rather than me disrupting the whole class which was very positive experience for him and me and and I didn’t really have anything any way to kind of process or do anything with that at the time. But then latterly now I understand what is going on. Suddenly it made sense of all of that. Um and how then through my ministry it felt like nobody was like me. And theological college which was quite a traditional place it just felt like why is nobody else making these patterns and connections? Why is why is everyone just focused on doing the same thing we’ve done for centuries and feeling like that’s going to fix things?

One researcher said that to have ADHD in this in this environment is like being a hunter in a world of farmers. Sure. There’s nothing wrong with farmers; we need farmers, but you’re just you’re wired differently. It’s a different thing. And that can have, depending on all sorts of things, it can have sort of mental health implications. Has that been your experience? what or you know, where have you where have you gone with that feeling of feeling different?
Yeah, absolutely. And and I think to a degree I’ve ended up in the church. Well, partly because God called me to do ministry, but it’s been a very convenient way for me to be my own boss and be judged on outputs and outcomes, not just on giving the same inputs every time as the farmer might. So, that’s been really helpful for me. Um but on the way to that certainly felt like I needed a fix the way that other people didn’t. Uh and so I struggle with sitting in long meetings which are a bit boring without having my device in front of me and I’ll be doing work at the same time as considering what’s going on. It’s really helpful. Um and kind of aware that I would it there are other professions where it fits better with my neurodiversity. So, if I were a Royal Marine, actually, I’d be surrounded by people who are ADHD cos it fits really. Or if I was a paramedic, it would fit really well with what I’m doing. Um, in ministry, I have a bit more work to do on that. Um, and um, to a degree, I have self-medicated historically when I was young by smoking um, great deal. Um, which gave me that kind of little buzz I needed all the time. I now drink a great deal of caffeine. um which keeps me kind of uh keeps me with that um little dopamine hit I need every now and then. Um professionally if you like in terms of ministry now uh it means that there are certain um particular modes of functioning which suit me well in my team. So working a team really helps. Um so recently um we ran a message church. I have two had two curates at the time. And so actually we could all play to our strengths and so whilst I was uh noticing everything that was going on, people come and go actually some people leaving now we need to move on to the next item what have you. Other of my curates were using their creativity or their personal skills to between us be the whole package.

Talking about that. So, you know, as a society, we seem to be sort of waking up to the idea that we’re very very different in the way that we perceive reality. And it’s we instead of categorising autistic people as, you know, we used to say you’re Aspergers and, you know, we used to just be like, oh, sorry, but you’re, you know, you’re not functioning the way you ‘should do’ kind of thing, we’re now kind of waking up a bit and places like the BBC or GCHQ are specifically employing people for dyslexia, for example, or for ASD. What do you think of the the things that we’re seeing? Because it seems to be now, you know, the word neurodiversity only came out in 1998 or something. So it seems it’s actually recent that we we’re starting to talk about ourselves in this terms in these terms. What do you think of the broader cultural things that happening that we might see?
Principally, I think we’re learning to be kind to ourselves and to each other. Um, and often the Church isn’t very good at that. I think, um, I’ve certainly gone through a masking process, if you like, through many different iterations of my life of presenting at interview what you’re looking for and then I work out how I can best fulfill what outcomes is being looked for. Um, but it was also then really helpful to be able to go out in the parish magazine and say, um, maybe we didn’t realize at the time we came here, but now we’ve worked out that we’re neurodiverse. Uh, and it will help you to support us and be kind to us. If you understand that this is my specialtity, this is what I’m rubbish at and that that should be okay.

Have you come across any blockages, any any issues with that or has it all been roses?
All the feedback we’ve had has been very positive partly from people saying I also don’t fit um but also um people who coming forward um and saying my experience of life is not normal. not necessarily because of neurodiversity, but that freed them up to bit of share with us if you like being the wounded healer um that actually one lady I was talking to suffers from PTSD uh and and could open up about that cos she felt like I was a safer person to talk to. So that was really powerful. Presumably there are people who felt less positive about this and maybe there’s a lot of people in the kind of older generation who feel like this is all a fad. Um, and I’m pretty sure I know some of older people who are neurodiverse, but they would never recognise it themselves, partly because it was beaten out of them at school when they were young. It’s part and they they can’t admit to themselves, let alone anyone else um what’s going on there.

What would you say to a member of clergy who um was struggling with this?
I think generally to say it’s been a really positive thing for um valuing myself and what I bring to the world the way God made me. Um and um I think it’s really self-awareness just so vital life in general and you know I’ve talked to levers from school about being self-aware and working out what God made you to be the best person God made you um to be. So I think I it’s absolutely vital for us all to work out who we are, what we bring to this. Uh and it really helps us be clear about what’s a good fit and a bad fit for us professionally if you like. Um and I know lots of clergy apply for umpteen positions in different churches and why is that not a fit? I don’t quite understand. I think it’s really helpful to to understand that. Uh and I think one of the things highlighted to me is there’s a real isolationist danger for clergy who work alone. Um not as part of a team uh particularly running a number of churches where they’re flitting around and not necessarily engaging at depth in any one place. It’s especially the case for the neurodiverse um and for those suffering with mental health disorder. But actually for all of us, we need to be connecting uh even people who are less sociable, more introverted, it’s still a key part of our mental health, to be connected at a profound level, not just with God, but actually with the people around us and to share what we’re working with other with people. Um so I feel like we need to be moving towards a a culture, a church culture of team working and supporting other people, isn’t just clergy obviously, lay people as well. um which has been a really vital part of my thriving rather than going mad.

I’m really interested in the when when I read the Gospels, the thing that really sticks out to me or has done recently is this thing of Jesus keeps disappearing. He does his little bit and then he gets in the boat and no one, no one, everyone’s like, “Oh, can we come in the boat with you?” and he’s just he’s he’s rowing off, you know, or he disappears through the crowd and it happens again and again and again. And you know, when I when I read the Gospels through a kind of um neurodiversity lens, I’m not going to put any labels on Jesus, but you know, even Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, they are wildly different to each other. Yeah. And what a what a brilliant thing to you know it’s sort of always been been part of. My understanding is is that you know when we talk about one body many parts, we we forget that we we’re very different and we we’re so quick to dishonor what we what we are, what we’re made to be. What’s your when you are thinking from a theological point of view what’s the sort of standout thing?
The standout thing for me is ever since I was young, um, in particular when I was young, what would Jesus do was a thing and people had bracelets with WWJD on. And that always kind of troubled me cos I thought I just feel like you haven’t thought through what would Jesus do cos Jesus is profoundly challenging, countercultural, and you’re not. just kind of and in a sense the question what would Jesus do is not necessarily such a helpful question but because I think what would Jesus do well he wouldn’t be running a church but he would be valuing diversity and he would be saying as a team we run a church and as a team we’re bringing all together and when I felt like I’ve not not been performing as I should as a member of clergy I think about what would Jesus doing I think all the stuff I’m not doing should Jesus wouldn’t be doing it either. Um, you know, you don’t read about That’s really helpful, isn’t it? Yeah. No, absolutely. It was really affirming to kind of realise that and think, well, actually, Jesus wouldn’t have been, he wasn’t based in one place, visiting lots of people, having lots of cup of tea and being very nice and Jesus just wasn’t nice. I was talking to um I was talking to a lovely lady at a wedding reception um a while back and she was saying I just recently started reading the stories about Jesus and realised that Jesus wasn’t the nice man I thought he was! And only then having discovered more recently my neurodiversity and suddenly think right if I did some research on this I should do some Bible study right where do we find neurodiversity in the Bible well actually everywhere, we find it all over, and I’m part I look back now at kind of the history of the Church and as against Jesus story and I just think how did they think this way of functioning was okay that we had to make everyone be the same. Yeah. Everyone had to wear the same kind of suit and wear a hat or not wear a hat and and everyone had to be polite and dof their cap to the [land]lord, and all of that just kind of it blows my mind. It took us 2,000 years to work out what it meant to be like Jesus and the disciples. How dumb were we? And it’s written down. Yeah, absolutely!

How is the model of Church changing?
It feels like there was a beginning to be a hollowing out of the Church that the kind of middle England middle church way of doing things is slowly dying. And what we’re going to be left with is charismatic churches. exciting and Anglo Catholic churches were bringing mystery and wonder um and that is where people are finding God. Um and I’ve spent years feeling quite um depressed if you like about the future of the Church and why is no one really wrestling with this and how we fix this problem and to a degree we needed to let go and let God fix that problem. It seems that this is now coming. the future of the Church is becoming clear. Um my eldest daughter who is just kind of old enough to be generation zed or gen Z maybe we call it um I was talking to her recently about why are you wanting to um do RE as one of your options at GCSE rather than German which you would excel at and would much easier. And she said but RE will make me a better person. And I thought that tells me something profound about your generation that that’s increasingly normal. And more and more people of that age group are exploring faith, exploring meaning, what it means to be alive. Um, and it really feels like that there’s something of a rejection of my generation’s um very downto-earth science approach to life. We can explain everything. We don’t need faith. We don’t need spirituality. And actually what our generation has done has made life really boring. And and Gen Z coming through say actually I’m searching for something more. I’m searching for meaning. What is life about? Um uh one of the things I’m involved with actually is um deliverance ministry in the supernatural. Gosh, the young people of today, they are desperate to hear about the supernatural. They’re not that can’t that just can’t possibly happen. So tell us about that because that tells us something really exciting about what life means. Actually, there is more to life than meets the eye. It’s not just about the everyday. It’s pretty exciting. Yeah, it’s brilliant. As we were saying earlier, neurodiversity is a relatively recent discovery and we’re still working out quite what that means. I think it’d be really helpful for us to think through actually how can we uh in the diversity of ministry in the Diocese of Gloucester work out between us what are the great strategies for ministry the people who are autistic or are dyslexic or what what how can we function really well in the world of ministry um so not just kind of play to our strengths but actually how can I support my weaknesses not just in a team where we work together which is really important. Uh but actually um might need to just learn some basic stuff of if you’re dyslexic and you are trying to write sermons and write this that and the other, you need this bit of software, you need this hardware and it’s going to make your life so much easier or you need to throw away your paper diary, you need whatever it is. Um, and I feel like we’re we’re playing catch-up on that at the moment and people are kind of trying to work it out for themselves. Um, but other people have already worked this out and we need to try and network better.

In your Curate sort of phase, you were you felt very different than other people, and you were surrounded by people who were going through the kind of regular way of doing it and they seemed fine with it, whether that was masking or not, but you that was obviously a very difficult thing. If you could say anything to yourself now, you know, if you if you could time travel back and and what would you say to yourself going through that?
Great question. I it feels like God created me for a purpose and because I’m different from other people that purpose is different and it’s no more or less important for that. Uh and that for all of us in our diversity at college actually we were all called to different paths. uh and it can feel like uh there’s a real pressure certainly then to conform uh and to fulfil this for me this kind of monastic high church priestly role um whereas actually I my calling is to something a little bit some that other stuff as well um and that actually to recognise there are other people like me called to do something similar I’m not on my and felt like I was on my own at the start and then slowly work out, well actually you’re a bit like me and you’re a bit like me. I’m not the only weird one here.

About a year ago, I started going to an ADHD group once a month. And that’s been really brilliant, in the middle of Bristol and there’s a when you go to it a couple of times they ask if you want to join our WhatsApp kind of thing and you can mute it cos it’s just mayhem. But it’s been brilliant. It’s been really helpful for me to go a lot of it’s very relatable which is really helpful just to see it. And then and then some of the stuff I’m like actually I don’t struggle with that and I’m very fortunate in that and it’s been helpful for me to to sort of step back from and go you know I’m I’m really lucky in lots of ways and then to celebrate the good stuff as well as um recognising some of the stuff that I thought was just me and I’m like oh I know they struggle with that as well.
Yeah. Yeah. If I’m having a bad day, that’s okay. Yeah. Because I don’t work 9 to 5. I don’t have to be in the office and pretend to be actually I can just have a bad day. It’s okay. And I know that tomorrow or next week I will then achieve a massive amount and and I’ll be playing catchup and that will be quite stressful. But that’s okay cos I’ll cope and I’ll come out the other end.

Um but that’s part of resilience, isn’t it? And in a role like yours, it’s it’s so important to have that resilient thing where you can go, ‘it’s all right to have a shocker, and that’s all right’, you know.
Yeah. And I’m not going to feel guilty about that. Actually, it’s just the way it is for me. There are lots of jobs I could do if I had to. And I could do it for a few days if I had to. Uh but actually, it’s not good for me to to have to function in these roles for very long because I can’t do it for that long and things will begin to fall apart in a in a really banal way. uh being asked to kind of be in the in the pantomime for the local group. I can say I’m well up for that, but I need to be remembering not many lines and not a huge amount of time in rehearsals. Partly because I’ve got the time, but actually I’m rubbish at remembering lines and it will drive me mad and I will do badly at this. So, I can just be really clear. I’ve worked this out now. Really clear this is this is what success looks like for me and I can set myself up to succeed and not pretend to myself I can do everything. Yeah. Good. Cool. I think we’re we’re done. It’s really helpful. Yeah. It’s really helpful.

What, just talking about it?
Yeah. Yeah. Good to get it out there.